Tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of my first day in youth ministry. It seems like yesterday that I started serving God through youth ministries. I was only 19 and what a ride it has been. One of the greatest hypocrisies of my life is that I was blessed to serve in youth ministry roles at such a young age and today I’m not certain that I would put a 19 year old in similar positions. Regardless, I’m thankful for the past 10 years. I’ve made a lot of mistakes and I’ve learned a lot. There are many things I would do differently if I could do them again. As I was reflecting on my past 10 years, I figured I would put together a list of 10 things I’ve learned (I could count more but I’ll save those for my 20 list that I’ll be doing in 10 more years). Take some time and read through my list. Some of the lessons on my list, I believe, can apply to anyone.
10 Lessons From 10 Years
- Youth ministry is full of highs and lows. From the highs of camps and retreats to the lows of the teen you invested so much time in giving up on their faith. Expect both and know that neither last forever.
- We must remember our place. Although it may be significant in its impact, we must remember that we only play a small role in the broad spectrum of a person’s life. Let’s not over emphasize our importance and remember that Jesus is still in charge.
- Teaching behavior modification does nothing for our teens and only makes happy parents and happy church members. We need to remember that our time with teens is short and so we should use that time to influence how they perceive and process information. Think tools for a lifetime not just tools for next week.
- Passion for change and passion for others are fickle and should not be trusted. On the flip side, deeply held convictions can be stale and stubborn. Instead we should seek some balance of passion for change, passion for other people and our deeply held convictions.
- The greatest life transformation happens in the small chunks of time and conversations that happen with individuals or small groups of individuals outside of the classroom or worship settings. Let us remember to take advantage of these times, even when we’re tired.
- Graduating kids out of the youth group every year is tough. Every year, between the months of May and August, I will grieve.
- Let’s not kid ourselves, the opinions of parents and church members matter. Even though at times we feel like they don’t understand the reasoning behind what we do, let us try to do our best to communicate the why behind everything. Many times people are not against what we’re doing, they just need the fog removed a little so they can see what’s really going on.
- Organization in youth ministry is rare. Strive to be organized. There are seasons when youth ministry runs at lightning speeds and organization becomes nearly impossible. Strive to be organized the rest of the time. It’s amazing how much credibility and trust you can gain from parents, church leaders and outside organizations with just a little organization. Someday when you mess up, you’ll need to cash in some of that credit you’ve gained.
- Think long term. Your attendance is down by 10% this semester; you’ve graduated your top singer and guitar player; you just can’t seem to win with a parent…no matter what you’re facing just remember that longevity and faithfulness will win out. In the end fun, passion and excitement are short lived and will never beat out faithfulness.
- The struggle between family time and youth ministry time is real and never gets easier. You will always be battling that balance. Try your best to set boundaries and don’t be afraid to defend those boundaries. I will always flex days so that I am not depriving my family of the time we should spend together. Always remember that you LOVE your family and CARE about the youth ministry- it should always fall in that terminology and order.
So here’s to the next 10 years and many more lessons!